February 2021 Newsletter
Hello, and a fun-loving February to you!
How do you talk to yourself?
Welcome, or welcome back, to my newsletter.
Today's issue is about talking to ourselves, ideally with kindness.
We're with ourselves all day long, every day. Are you your favorite companion and cheerleader, or your
own harshest critic? The empty speech bubbles in the drawing to the left could be filled with negativity, like "I'm
so stupid!" when you make a silly mistake, or with friendly encouragement and support. It's your choice.
Our self-talk can be so automatic, we're not even aware what we're saying. It's like we're running on autopilot, or
stuck in the same thought loop that keeps repeating. Maybe whenever the topic of finances comes up, your first knee-jerk
thought is "I've always been bad with money". Or if the discussion is about health and fitness, that triggers an internal
reaction of "I'll never lose enough weight to look attractive".
If you catch yourself saying "always" or "never" about yourself or your abilities, I invite you to challenge that. Absolute statements like "I'll never
be able to ...." put an artificial limit on us, so we don't explore possibilities that could allow us to break through that
boundary. If you'd love to have a male romantic partner, yet keep saying "there are no good men out there", you're defeating
yourself before you go on any dates, since you're expecting them to turn out poorly. You're proving the self-talk right.
My personality is prone to worry, and I also tend to rush when it's not needed, and to try too hard, often exerting way more physical or
mental effort than a task requires. In an attempt to counteract these patterns, I've developed the habit of chanting to myself "Easy and gentle, easy and
gentle", especially when I'm driving. You've probably seen the bumper sticker that says "Easy Does It!", which could have been written especially for me.
This soothing self-talk mantra grew out of my realizing that I formerly told myself to hurry up, or when driving to be on High Alert and "watch out for the other guy". I was expecting
problems and interruptions, which is not a peaceful way to proceed through Life. Recently I told a wise friend that I had 2 new classes starting, feeling like my plate was too full.
The friend, who also loves to learn, replied "How exciting!". I thought "What a great attitude!" to myself. He was looking at the opportunity, while I was focused on the time management challenge.
The image above delights me, a woman being comforted by words. Since I was very young I have loved to read and to write, and it makes me feel even better when my words
can enlighten or soothe someone else. What a super-power we all have, to use our words to motivate and to otherwise help ourselves. Are you making full use of your super-power?
Choose your words of self-talk wisely, because your whole being is listening.
For an article on self-talk about eyes and vision,
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You're helping many other people!
Enjoy the start of this fantastic month of February.
I'll write again in a few weeks. Take care!