rainbow eye image
Nancy L. Neff Coaching and Healing

LifeForce Abundance Coach
Vision and Energy Coach

 Nancy in red jacket

Email: Nancy@NancyLNeff.com

LifeForce Abundance Coaching Sessions
Complimentary Discovery Session

Contact Nancy

Mid-January 2020 Newsletter

Hello, and a magical juicy Mid-January to you!
Welcome, or welcome back, to my newsletter. Today's issue is about holding too tightly to your limitations. Enjoy!

Are you holding too tightly to your limitations?
 don't let your struggle become your identity Author Richard Bach wrote "Argue for your limitations, and sure enough, they're yours to keep". When someone gives you a sincere compliment, and you start listing all the reasons why you don't look that good today, or are doing a lot of things poorly, you are drawing that cage of restrictions more tightly around yourself. Why would you ever want to consciously crimp your growth like this?

First of all, it may not be conscious. It's possible we're used to deflecting any praise automatically, so we don't appear conceited. A friend saying "I love that outfit!" gets the immediate knee-jerk reply of "This old thing?". Why not let in the compliment? You don't have to strut and preen. A simple "Thank you! This color always makes me feel good", or something similar, honors the connection with the other person, and most important, does not belitte yourself.

 man's job The lady to the left is not doing what has traditionally been thought of as "women's work", but she doesn't let that stop her. Are you using the justification of "I'm too old" or "I'm not creative" or "I'm not good with money" or a similar excuse to put a lid on your dreams? Like the first image above asks, are you more tied to your struggle, of how hard it is and how many obstacles seem to be confronting you, than of keeping your eyes on the goal and becoming a more fulfilled version of yourself?

The Tall Poppy Syndrome, where those flowers sticking up above the others have their heads lopped off to "fit in", could have been written with me in mind. I was near the top of my class all throughout school, and was cautioned more than once to "dumb it down" so others would like me. I was much more comfortable in the classroom interacting with my teachers than socializing with my peers, so learning and studying were where I concentrated my energy. Somehow I decided I wasn't likable, especially if you really got to know me and didn't just want help with your homework. I carried that self-imposed limitation forward for many years.

 eagle This belief that I wasn't likable, that I was too weird or different to have close friendships, was just that, a belief. However I thought it was a fact and never examined or challenged it. Now I know there are plenty of people who will like me, and I've even developed some emotional intelligence to accompany my book smarts. Might you have some limiting beliefs you're not questioning either? Think about it, playing with possibilities. You might have more opportunities for expansion than you're acknowledging.

Finally, could there be an advantage in the limitation you're holding onto? This can be uncomfortable to admit, so be gentle with yourself. You're doing the best you know how. Back when I thought no one wanted to be my friend, I was protecting myself against the risk of rejection. If I don't reach out, I can't be refused! And I eventually decided it wasn't worth it to stay so isolated. I encourage you to reach out and expand your own limits, making the most of what poet Mary Oliver calls "your one wild and precious life".

To read about a limited way of looking, which if modified could improve your vision and entire outlook, click here.

Have you wondered if my work could help you?
I'm now offering complimentary Discovery Session consultations of 20 to 30 minutes, for us to discuss what you're looking for in a coach, and to see whether you and I feel like a fit. To schedule your Discovery Session, click here.

Do you want your own copy of future newsletters?
If a friend forwarded this to you, or you're reading it from Facebook or LinkedIn, this is a hit-or-miss method of receiving it, and you might not see it next time. If you'd like to be on my distribution list, you can join here. You can un-subscribe at any time. Thank you!

Please send me your questions and comments
Let me know what you've wondered about concerning energy medicine or vision or dreams. I'll be glad to write a short article addressing that topic. Thank you to those who have sent me questions, or see a question you asked me in a private session written about here. You're helping many other people! Enjoy the second half of this special month of January. I'll write again in a few weeks. Take care!

Be generous! Share this newsletter with your friends and family. Share this page >

Click here to see past newsletters.

Click here to unsubscribe.

© Copyright 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020. All rights reserved.